You Are Who You Meet

There are people that pass through your life that shape who you are and how you’ve become who you are; a few for the worse, most for the better.  Even the ones who negatively impact you often improve your life as they become the cautionary tales.

Living in a small province like Nova Scotia and a small city like Halifax, it’s very likely you’ll see each other again at some point.

I’m thinking of this for a few reasons this week.  It is coming up to the Holiday Season, with hope and joy and possibly even Peace on Earth on our minds.  Time to mend fences, build bridges, start anew, put your best foot forward, learn from your past, put your big girl pants on (big boy pants I presume work the same way.)

Another reason ‘you are who you meet’ is on my mind is that I saw this past weekend one of those teachers from my school days – you know the ones.  The one or two, or in my case seven, that I’ve never forgotten; whose story I’ve told, whose lessons (and I don’t mean English) I learned, who probably didn’t even realize the incredible impact they had on their students.  It made my day; heck, it made my week to see Mrs. J.  She was and is vibrant, independent, fun and funny; and back in the late 70’s we girls saw her as the kind of woman we could be.  Single and making her own way in the world, undaunted and unfettered, Mrs. J made us actually feel the liberation movement making its’ way into suburban Halifax.  I had to hug her when I saw her.  There are a lot of very real success stories, personal and professional, coming from our era of J.L. Ilsley High – and many of those can be in some way attributed to the role models that she and a few other teachers were to us.  I sure hope she heard my sincere Thank You.

I lately met another woman I knew slightly many years ago.  Her lessons must have been tough ones.  I remembered her as a sweet sunny girl, and felt badly for the hard woman she is now.  In turn, I have been shaped by my recent encounter with her; cautionary tales indeed.

Lastly, I watched the movies Before Sunrise (1994) and Before Sunset (2004) last week, sequentially.  If you haven’t watched them, do.  In essence, two young people through a chance meeting find their soul mates.  In their youthful naiveté, they don’t appreciate that this is a gift that seldom is given, and squander it; they don’t exchange contact information and move along in their lives.  It is only upon later reflection that they realize that this was an encounter that has shaped their being; a connection upon which all other relationships are measured and found wanting, a pivot point in the creation of who they have become.

Over the next few weeks, thank your Preacher or Rabbi, hug a teacher, send a card to a mentor, forgive that spiteful co-worker, buy dinner for your long-time friend, tell your Dad or your son you love him, find a long lost love.  Most importantly, look inside and see the person you are and realize that we are the sum of our experiences.  And we only go around once; flawed, bruised, dinged up, but lucky to be living where we are in the world, and hopefully generally happy.

In 1978 a co-worker at my after school job at Sears gave me a brass key ring that says ‘Super Weird Person.’  My keys are still on it.  Thanks Jackie.  I hope your life is going well.  Merry Christmas.

Yarmouth on My Mind

I'm always surprised by how many Nova Scotians tell me they've never been to Yarmouth.  No, that's wrong. I'm always shocked.  Never?? Never driven around the South Shore and back up through the Valley?

Most folks tend to think of it as the far end of the province (in NS, read as 'Earth') and virtually inaccessible.  In reality, it is about  two and a half hours from Halifax, a perfect distance to drive on a sunny afternoon along the South Shore (OK, it's going to take you six hours because there's so much to poke around and explore along the way.)  And then you get to stay overnight in a lovely, possibly quaint, B&B or motel for an excellent price.  You get to really see the town, shop in the shops, eat the food.  Oh, the food...don't get me started...

Most folks tend to see it as dying; no jobs, no industry left, no boat to the US anymore.  I don't see it that way.  Sure, a few parts of it have been horribly disfigured due to bad urban planning over the years.  The train is gone.  The ferry is gone.  However, I see it through the romantic eyes of my childhood, where four kids from Halifax could get up early in the morning, wander through town all day, stop at the DQ for a Mister Misty (lime) and find amazing things everywhere we looked.  A giant tuna being landed on the wharf.  Holly bushes as big as a garage.  Old moss laden cemeteries.  Gigantic houses on huge lots.  Names right out of Nova Scotian history books.  The sights and smells of my great uncle's butcher shop.  A real gramophone that played 'Blueberry Hill' on a 78 record.  A lemonade stand on the main road through Sand Beach, where American visitors in big cars with real white shoes just like in the movies would give us a quarter - a US quarter! (1930's memories courtesy of Marie, Villages of Yarmouth County.)

I was last there in the summer this year, and went for a run along the wonderfully groomed old train trail, with my Auntie's dog.  We listened to some amazing bluegrass music in the bandstand on the waterfront.  I bought a hand made hat and mitts (on July 1st!) from a sweet lady in a craft co-op.  We spent the morning at the new Farmer's Market (yummy peach salsa,) trying on fabulous and stylish shoes, and of course, doing our Frenchie's hour.  Had fishcakes for brunch at Rudder's Brew Pub.

If you haven't been to Yarmouth - GO!  They need you, they need us.  Get out of the car, walk along the streets and see the Grand Dames of Seacaptain's houses.  Buy some amazingly fresh fish at the Red & White in Dayton.  Go over to the Forchu Light and have tea.  Stay in a motel overlooking Lake Milo.  Go to the Firefighter's Museum.

I'm passionate about exploring this incredible province we live in.  As Joseph Howe said, we need to "Brag of your country. When I'm abroad I brag of everything that Nova Scotia is, has, or can produce..."  However, the lack of tangible support of Yarmouth by Nova Scotians worries me.  It's NOT the end of the Earth.  And it's well worth the visit.  Trust me, the shoes alone are worth going for.

Photos courtesy of Souwester.ca, traveltonovascotia.ca,